APPARENTLY moving house is one of the most stressful experiences a person can have.

And I’m sure it is, but has anyone ever measured the stress of the part that comes before the big move - house hunting?

This is the current predicament me and my other half find ourselves in right now.

We’ve outgrown our current little humble abode and are looking to upsize and upgrade.

In the years we’ve spent saving, I thought the searching and viewing of houses would be the most fun.

And it is. But there are pitfalls to avoid.

Before we had even viewed our first property we set ourselves all the usual and obvious ground rules.

You know the ones. They’re the golden rules of what not to do when house hunting and after two days on the hunt, I’d fallen foul of every one.

People say not to be put off by decor or furniture.

The current owner has lived there for 20-plus years and by the looks of things, haven’t lifted a paint brush in that entire time. “That won’t bother me,” I told myself. “I’ll be able to see passed it.” Turns out, I can, but trying to visualise what is essentially a barnyard decked out in chintz, as a homely comfortable living room is harder than you think. So right there, was my first mistake.

Funky smells are also (I’m told) easy enough to remedy, but the nose knows what it knows, you know?

If a house smells of wet dogs, I ain’t buying it. Simples. Plus, if these home owners don’t care about the house’s basic aromas who’s to say they give two hoots about the stuff that matters like maintenance and the fundamental upkeep of their gaff? And, voila; it joins the blacklist.

Same goes for nosy neighbours. If the back garden is overlooked by five other houses then that’s a deal breaker.

It’s not that I want to be sunbathing in my skimpies in the one good week of weather we get a year, but at the same time, don’t try and sell me a ‘detached’ house which sits closer to its neighbours than I sleep next to my other half at night.

But the ultimate house hunting faux pas that everyone tells you not to make (and I made it within 48 hours of viewings) is falling in love with a property and pinning your hopes on getting it.

Yep, I am a house hunting cliche.

Seen it, viewed it, loved it, bid on it, lost it, hate life. Welcome to the numbskull-cycle.

People tell me it ‘just wasn’t for you’ and ‘something else will come along’ and I’m sure it will, but until then I’ll lick my wounds and continue to irrationally measure every house I see against the one that got away.